DOA Case #0020
The latest exhumed grave reveals an odd autopsy of the first Christian horror movie from a distributor called Holy Moly Pictures, but it considers their movie a found footage film, except that it clearly contains edits, special effects (sort-of) and audio enhancements. Most of the movie occurs during a “lock in” hence the title, which is a slumber party inside of a church, religious school, and or center, whichever you choose to call it and monitored by youth counselors, pastors, or church elders held from late afternoon until dawn, with teens of both sexes present. The creators of the film want to show the viewers the definite and indefensible position of the link between pornography, demonic activity, and evils in general. This evidence of theirs shown through the movie, notes the intension to ban and bar all porn and return society to the moral high-ground, thereby stopping the sexual desires of teens and reinforcing families. Of course, the film goes further linking to Italian food and mathematics, and then relating to the puritan framework, didn’t turn out well for the sufferers of injustice during the Salem Witch Trials or other naïve persecutions.
No director listed on the film, and in fact no credits at all, though the IMDb reveals that Rich Praytor helmed the project that later did the documentary film Ancient Secrets of Essential Oils (2016) and the writer credit falls to Beverly Banks, they also produced and starred in the film. The cast names find themselves listed but no clear indication of who is who. In fact, in an interview with VICE, producers state “unironic (I know not a real word but they used it) scenes will probably seem hilarious to secular, porn-loving audiences… to Christians the horror movie is a much more serious film.” [*1] As for the filmmakers, pornography became the first topic to center a film around, to them the worst offensive theme and no better forum than a horror movie (that means the cheapest). The filmmakers to assume given its medium, that horror fans in general wouldn’t seek it out, but listing as demonic possession and found footage, centered right onto them will actually lure them away from these forces and onto a righteous and glorious path. However, it contains, no violence, no bad language, no sinful pictures, no nudity, just two scary moments for the weak-willed fans. Rich at the time noted that no horror films deal with pornography terms or themes, oh how wrong he actual is, I think the average hardcore fan can name few R-rated flicks which fall along these themes, likely Porno [2019]
I have previously discussed this dull movie on a podcast or two, and once reviewed before, however not to the extent that was truly needed, hence I’ve done the rare item of exhuming the rotting corpse of a flick. I would also want to extend my intention with this review, it is not a slap at the Christian faith, rather the absurdity of the movie and topics therein discussed.
AUTOPSY OF THE FILM:
Ah, where can one begin, first a goofy opening with the former youth pastor Chris, now as an insurance sales rep, speaking of the evil of that night at The Lock In, and is acting quite laughable then stating the film shown to horrified church elders of the First Baptist Church. Oh, and that evil is a demon possessed pornographic magazine, that’s right not a person per se though muddled badly in the third act on that aspect. Then a jump cut to watching Justin, turn on his video camera then sit on his bed with his back to it and appear to thumb through a porno mag, fully dressed and the audience sees nothing not even the magazine. Then a distortion on the camera occurs and thereby signaling a demonic influence. Get it, oh that’s scary, seriously what teen would film themselves doing this action, NONE, NOT ONE OF THEM.
Okay let’s proceed, introducing Blake, the ringleader of the group telling the camera that Justin holds how cool he is and how great this lock in going to be for his buddy Nicky. The dialogue between Nicky and his parents becomes so outrageously silly, as they condemn him eating pizza with Jessica, because of the sauce gets everywhere and the father makes the connection of linguini with sex, “ling weenie” because, it is a meal you suck it in to eat it. Seriously it’s in the dialogue. Then with statements of “Did God introduce you to her? Christians get pregnant too. Never touch a girl until at least 25-years old. Solving math problems, leads to sex as a thank you,” this insanity continues with questioning of the lock in to have separate bathrooms for girls and boys. WAIT… WHAT? It’s at their church, they would’ve been notified beforehand, and what it serves as both a school and activity center, this is all leads to dumber dialogue. Oh, that math problem reference, it is to hint that girls, are incapable of solving those problems, so thankful for a Man to show them the proper path – yeah, a knee in the groin, not in this movie.
Now according to the filmmakers, the first sin, which turns the boys to the Devil, is the discovery of pornography, but first they break ‘man’s laws’ such as trespassing, ah who are they kidding it’s to ignore that law, anyway, thereby find laying on top of trash the magazine in a clean wrinkled brown paper bag.
It clearly shows the dated mindset of the writer, which was the norm in the 1980s; today the porn exists on computers and cell phones, and this movie takes place in 2010. Blake plants the magazine into Nicky’s backpack and off church they head, soon enough it all translates to a discovery by Jessica, who becomes disgusted and upset. Pastor Chris takes it and the boys out to the parking lot and burns the magazine, while praying, but soon afterwards, security cameras show a door opening by itself and later a rocking chair mysteriously rocks by itself in the nursery. Oh wow, scary, what’s going to happen it this very lame horror movie.
Incredibly the magazine reappears, undamaged, still in the brown wrapper, because that’s how porn rolls, and demons hang out in dumpsters, the trio dispose of it in a trash can, quickly the demon knocks over the trash can.
They freak out like little children running back downstairs, into darkness, which symbolizes the absence of the Lord, the lost is blackness, and left behind, as they only find Jessica hiding in a closet, her friend Genesis gone. Blake with such fakery gently bangs a chair against a window, of course, no damage (not in the budget), and those outside can’t hear them, as they find themselves condemned to loneliness for their sins and damnation from the demon.
A few trivial things happen nothing of any importance, the teens while in the pastor’s office watch a tape of a parishioner talking about porn and masturbation, and while he cries, Chris leaves to get tissues and suddenly he becomes a demon with an enlarged mouth and blackened eyes.
Now wait a minute, this discovery makes no sense, since when does a pastor videotape a discussion, and leave it laying around, and has no tissues in the office. They incorporated a child, as the demon, again the same appearance as on the tape, but why a child and not a succubus (female demon to entice them, because it is a church and that’s no-no). The bowels of the movie lay in ruins of bizarre rancid disease of misdirected and thoroughly uninteresting series of scenes.
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CAUSES OF DEATH OF FILM:
The likely cause of the demise of the film falls first on the filmmakers and then the cast, as no one actually portrays themselves as believable which needs to occur in a supposedly found footage movie. Then logic of scenes falters heavily, with the teens’ clumsy dialogue and the adults with flubbed lines, overacting the moments, and not to mention the horrendous filming techniques. It includes extreme facial close-ups, and Justin’s camera never losing power or needing to change tapes, the audio glitches often and special effects nonexistent, the demonic sounds a low moan and high pitch screams. Demons in horror films do visit churches, without fear (such as Pinhead in Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth [1992]), as the crosses are merely symbolic; the faith compels everything, fans of vampire slayers know it; and herein no crosses inverted and nothing truly offensive such as a destroyed bible or actions. This demon, likely receiving a demotion in status, as it contributes a laughable farce film, sadly not in a good manner. If the film was so cherished, as a deterrent for sin, pornography and Italian food then it stays popular, even if really awful, which it is, but all the links to the domain site, have gone dead. Demonic power???
In addition, the film acts more as a sermon, the filmmakers truly aren’t interested in making a movie for entertainment purpose, that is more sinful and takes away from teaching the gospel, in lies a problem of reaching a secular audience, preaching is found as a turn-off. Then adding the static back-and-forth one cut between two characters and confusion of the extreme versus normal close-up shows some laziness; most understand the 3-cut-method; which is wide to establish location, med-size those most important in the shot, close-up shot is something important about to happen. There are other types of shots, but this series often occurred in numerous scenes.
SUMMARY OF FINDINGS:
First a spoiler alert, everyone, aside from the demon, is completely safe and absolutely no violence occurs to anyone, in other words this film suggested PG rating is only for the topic. However, the movie just sucks royally, many clichés find themselves used in the film, from the CGI demons similar to Grave Encounters [2011] and the dialogue of “Compel you” yes, the Exorcist rears its head, but the demon never pushes any boundaries. This film forgets the rules of going for the extreme and making one scared, rather gives a preaching lesson and is very boring. The findings once again prove simply leave this in an unmarked grave; it contained nothing for horror fans and the movie is occasionally found on YouTube. SIMPLY NOT SCARY!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4185488/
[*1] https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/yvqvej/we-spoke-to-the-producers-of-the-lock-in
IMDb Rating: 1.8/10
DOA Rating: 1.5/10
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