This is an odd one, first allow me to clearly state that there are no zombies presented, only individuals excessively wandering and mumbling incoherently about ridding others of pesky body hair, seriously and honestly. Now I know what are you thinking wait why did you choose to review this movie, I didn’t it was on the Visions of Horror for January 2021, someone added it. If it is on the list I must watch and review it, those are the rules to this challenge. No one needs to take the movie seriously, the title usage is only made to lure one into their timewasting club; there’s no gore factors, but plenty of nudity, a true T&A affair. Michael Roush served as director, his credit in that department, though his IMDb (page states other projects in pre-production) and this very dreadful script that forgot to have a plot or any scenes connect to each other is from Elizabeth S.J. Bergholz her only credit too. Simply a rotten amateurish horror-comedy with horrible and inappropriate sound effects, but secured distribution from Cinema Epoch known for releasing The Haunting of La Llorona  and Final Exam .
Where to begin, it’s the most difficult, Sharon (Jill Miller), a lingerie saleslady and city council member, and Sven (Tre Lovell), a barber who is her best friend who both live in a small fishing town community need to defend against Yvonne Wayne (Gwen Somers (The Summoned )) who sets up a wax removal business, painful to customers and viewers. Her clientele soon become sex-hungry zombies who chant or in some case mutter “no more pesky body hair” repeatedly. Seriously this is the so-called plot to the movie. A few of the scenes have a transitioning goofy morning radio show which is very distracting, perhaps to help with boring scenes taking place on the screen. The cast really works on selling it, that’s amazing giving what they handle in the movie, including leaf blowers to excise the evil, no kidding. Its movie geared to teenage boys, seeking some jollies, bad flatulence jokes, and so bad it leads to wasted laughs it is by no means directed for the high-brow humor found in Shaun of the Dead  or Dracula: Dead and Loving It .
Unsure where to start, the cheesy acting, aided by technical missteps in almost every frame, namely some sound quality issues and lack of special effects, thankfully it’s only 80-minutes for the audience to deal with in these lousy scenes. There’s plenty of filmmakers doing solid work with less money and equipment, if one of them viewed when they felt down, it would cure them of their depression quickly. This isn’t softcore horror, just a lot of nudity for the sake flashing it on the screen with reason or understanding, even an adult movie gives some mediocre attempt of a plot, or defining a scene, nothing from the so-called script helps in that department.
You don’t need to waste your time with this movie, it’s not enjoyable nor scary, the entertainment factor is slightly above DOA standard. The title of the movie and artwork suggest a b-movie with blood splatter qualities, well that’s not the case, it’s just amazing the types of films which get made sometimes, and that no one seems to be laughing their way through the lines. This makes one long for something from Chemical Burn Entertainment or Wild Eye Releasing with one their shark movies.
TAGLINE: Prepare For No Hair!
IMDb Rating 3.5
Baron’s Rating: 2.5